Bogfadnan is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, competent narwhal.

Bogfadnan created an electron five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bogfadnan, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bogfadnan, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Bogfadnan's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Bogfadnan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never feed lots of wheat to dolphins while wearing pink shirts.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Retreat if five monkeys approach from the east.
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