Sanwatzig is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, flying goat.

Sanwatzig created an up quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Sanwatzig, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Sanwatzig, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Sanwatzig's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Sanwatzig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick frogs.

2. Do not sing in public.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ants.

5. You must never eat corn.