Nulhapsab is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, irritating cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Nulhapsab created the planet Venus six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nulhapsab, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nulhapsab, it will turn you into a plant.

Nulhapsab's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Nulhapsab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no sheep in a building before entering it.

2. Never talk about quantum mechanics near grasshopers while wearing white ear rings.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Nulhapsab must be the most important thing in your life.