Flownakcamgepbit is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, annoying zebra.

Flownakcamgepbit created Africa two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flownakcamgepbit, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Flownakcamgepbit, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Flownakcamgepbit's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Flownakcamgepbit's Holy Commandments

1. Always help pigs.

2. Erect five copper sculptures of Flownakcamgepbit on top of important buildings.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.