Pakcutrat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, merciless spider.

Pakcutrat created the Sol system two billion years ago.

If you believe in Pakcutrat, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Pakcutrat, it will curse you with boils.

Pakcutrat's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Pakcutrat's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Pakcutrat.

2. Never hurt birds.

3. Do not trade with those who eat figs.

4. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Do not eat gooseberries.