Gomtombasttarp Pogmethub is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, calm otter.

Gomtombasttarp Pogmethub created a down quark four years ago.

If you believe in Gomtombasttarp Pogmethub, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gomtombasttarp Pogmethub, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Gomtombasttarp Pogmethub's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Gomtombasttarp Pogmethub's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no sheep in a building before entering it.

2. Never feed wheat to seals while wearing tights.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. You must never eat parsnips.

5. Do not trade with those who eat grapes.