Fagtagcub is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, witless dolphin.

Fagtagcub created an electron seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Fagtagcub, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Fagtagcub, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Fagtagcub's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Fagtagcub's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near manatees while wearing purple kilts.

2. Do not speak about corn.

3. Do not eat strawberries.

4. Never think about chlorophyll.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.