Map Spagparkarntarg is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, strong hummingbird.

Map Spagparkarntarg created the Milkyway two billion years ago.

If you believe in Map Spagparkarntarg, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Map Spagparkarntarg, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Map Spagparkarntarg's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Map Spagparkarntarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not drink water in red rooms.