Cabvanmisbif is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, self-confident goat.

Cabvanmisbif created parasitic wasps four years ago.

If you believe in Cabvanmisbif, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Cabvanmisbif, he will turn you into a mole.

Cabvanmisbif's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Cabvanmisbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Erect a giant green sculpture of Cabvanmisbif in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always help snails.

5. Retreat if four capybaras approach from the west.