Gudjonbed is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, bad-tempered alligator.

Gudjonbed created a charm quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gudjonbed, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gudjonbed, it will refuse to believe in you.

Gudjonbed's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Gudjonbed's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Run away if six grasshopers approach from the east.

4. Never go into mauve rooms.

5. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.