Bodnill is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, omniscient bat.

Bodnill created an up quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Bodnill, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bodnill, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Bodnill's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Bodnill's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not keep nine capybaras in a large pit.

3. Erect four gold sculptures of Bodnill on top of important buildings.

4. Do not wear platinum on your body.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.