Stanbuslin Limnuldanpitminwapdaparn is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, passionate dog.

Stanbuslin Limnuldanpitminwapdaparn created the planet Jupiter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Stanbuslin Limnuldanpitminwapdaparn, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Stanbuslin Limnuldanpitminwapdaparn, he will turn you into a mole.

Stanbuslin Limnuldanpitminwapdaparn's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Stanbuslin Limnuldanpitminwapdaparn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat corn.

2. Do not wear silicon on your body.

3. Always help sick horses.

4. Never paint your neck brown.

5. Do not shave your hands.