Ganlargbot Sasfonvab Higgarvabbissjonsitomindud is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, happy tapir.

Ganlargbot Sasfonvab Higgarvabbissjonsitomindud created Mount Everest eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ganlargbot Sasfonvab Higgarvabbissjonsitomindud, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ganlargbot Sasfonvab Higgarvabbissjonsitomindud, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Ganlargbot Sasfonvab Higgarvabbissjonsitomindud's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Ganlargbot Sasfonvab Higgarvabbissjonsitomindud's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lemons to birds while wearing yellow shirts.

2. Do not hurt swans.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never think about gravity.