Jamfonflanhattanpadnart is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, cheerful duck.

Jamfonflanhattanpadnart created tapeworms three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jamfonflanhattanpadnart, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Jamfonflanhattanpadnart, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Jamfonflanhattanpadnart's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Jamfonflanhattanpadnart's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear blue.

2. Do not wear zinc on your body.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never wear mauve boots.

5. Never talk about moths.