Gumcut is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, proud raven.

Gumcut created everything that exists two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumcut, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gumcut, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Gumcut's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Gumcut's Holy Commandments

1. Put Gumcut first in all things.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never talk about electromagnetism.

5. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.