Sisniblatmathap is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, humane gerbil.

Sisniblatmathap created the planet Earth eight million years ago.

If you believe in Sisniblatmathap, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sisniblatmathap, he will ignore you.

Sisniblatmathap's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Sisniblatmathap's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six manatees approach from the north.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Always make sure there are no swans in a room before entering it.

4. Always look after injured squirrels.

5. Pray towards the west.