Talmisfob is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, selfish zebra.

Talmisfob created a charm quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Talmisfob, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Talmisfob, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Talmisfob's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Talmisfob's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics near moths while wearing white rings and balancing six nickel spheres on your face.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not run in public.

5. Always look after injured eagles.