Bamflanveg Canlakbell is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, tiresome unicorn.

Bamflanveg Canlakbell created the planet Mars eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bamflanveg Canlakbell, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bamflanveg Canlakbell, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Bamflanveg Canlakbell's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Bamflanveg Canlakbell's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never wear boots.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never think ill of sick eagles.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate grasshopers.