Camnibsandlim is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, omnipotent raccoon.

Camnibsandlim created energy two years ago.

If you believe in Camnibsandlim, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Camnibsandlim, he will curse you with boils.

Camnibsandlim's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Camnibsandlim's Holy Commandments

1. Always help badgers in need.

2. Never think ill of sick rats.

3. Never feed lots of oranges to nematodes while wearing mauve ear rings.

4. Erect four gold sculptures of Camnibsandlim on top of important buildings.

5. Never talk about fire.