Kimbiffud is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, self-assured coyote.

Kimbiffud created the Milkyway eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimbiffud, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kimbiffud, he will remove you from existence.

Kimbiffud's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Kimbiffud's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about chromosomes.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always obey Kimbiffud's priests.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.