Jop is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, slow snail.

Jop created the planet Earth four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jop, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Jop, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Jop's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Jop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never talk about special relativity.

4. Do not keep eight snakes in a large pit.

5. Do not shave your legs.