Bomlad is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, thoughtless hummingbird.

Bomlad created energy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bomlad, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bomlad, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Bomlad's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Bomlad's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if nine horses approach from the west.

2. Never mention ducks.

3. Do not wear blue clothing.

4. Never run in the presence of hamsters.

5. Never wear corsets.