Pidminzenbissfatxingum is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, tiresome eagle.

Pidminzenbissfatxingum created the world seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Pidminzenbissfatxingum, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Pidminzenbissfatxingum, he will turn you into a rat.

Pidminzenbissfatxingum's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Pidminzenbissfatxingum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Pidminzenbissfatxingum's name in vain.

2. Do not drink water in red rooms.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.

4. Do not speak about spinach.

5. Feed all hungry mites.