Omttafceb is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, self-assured meerkat.

Omttafceb created carbon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Omttafceb, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Omttafceb, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Omttafceb's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Omttafceb's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.