Kapgonsandbumnabcussfunzan Vonfaghot is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, flying fairy.

Kapgonsandbumnabcussfunzan Vonfaghot created the planet Jupiter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Kapgonsandbumnabcussfunzan Vonfaghot, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kapgonsandbumnabcussfunzan Vonfaghot, it will torture you forever.

Kapgonsandbumnabcussfunzan Vonfaghot's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Kapgonsandbumnabcussfunzan Vonfaghot's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine sheep approach from the west.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Always help bats in need.

4. Always obey Kapgonsandbumnabcussfunzan Vonfaghot's priests.

5. Never eat peanuts.