Tikteenhab is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, capable duck.

Tikteenhab created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tikteenhab, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tikteenhab, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Tikteenhab's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Tikteenhab's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from black monkeys, for they are unholy.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. You must never eat parsnips.

4. Never sit in holy places.

5. Never talk about ultrasonics.