Nurlgutneg is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, annoying skunk.

Nurlgutneg created life eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurlgutneg, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nurlgutneg, it will destroy your home planet.

Nurlgutneg's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Nurlgutneg's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dogs.

5. You must never eat lemons.