Parknabrow is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, emotional meerkat.

Parknabrow created humanity two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Parknabrow, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Parknabrow, she will ignore you.

Parknabrow's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Parknabrow's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate monkeys.

2. Never talk about planets.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Parknabrow.

5. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.