Pignurltomtintabcunponvog is a god.

He takes the form of a small, quiet rhinoceros.

Pignurltomtintabcunponvog created matter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pignurltomtintabcunponvog, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Pignurltomtintabcunponvog, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Pignurltomtintabcunponvog's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Pignurltomtintabcunponvog's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Pignurltomtintabcunponvog.

2. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always help gulls in need.

4. Never think about dark energy near eagles while wearing orange shoes and balancing six titanium spheres on your face.

5. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Pignurltomtintabcunponvog in the centre of the settlement.