Teenrullcentif is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, dishonest spider.

Teenrullcentif created oxygen four million years ago.

If you believe in Teenrullcentif, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Teenrullcentif, she will turn you into a sheep.

Teenrullcentif's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Teenrullcentif's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chlorophyll.

2. Never hurt turtles.

3. Never talk about stars.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Hamsters are not to be trusted.