Hamfossren is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, ruthless centaur.

Hamfossren created a photon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Hamfossren, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hamfossren, she will destroy your home solar system.

Hamfossren's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Hamfossren's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about optics near whales while wearing orange tights and balancing six tin spheres on your feet.

2. Always help ants.

3. Retreat if nine nematodes approach from the east.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.