Vabzagbop is a god.

It takes the form of a small, unselfish deer.

Vabzagbop created the planet Saturn nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Vabzagbop, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vabzagbop, it will try to impress you with trees.

Vabzagbop's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Vabzagbop's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat parsnips.

2. Capybaras are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never talk about quantum field theory near squirrels while wearing blue trousers and balancing seven copper spheres on your neck.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not dye your hair fawn.