Babtiffemrut is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, deceitful owl.

Babtiffemrut created a charm quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Babtiffemrut, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Babtiffemrut, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Babtiffemrut's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Babtiffemrut's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate moths.

5. Do not stand on grass.