Tonvanvag is a god.

She takes the form of a small, prudent whale.

Tonvanvag created a down quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tonvanvag, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Tonvanvag, she will torture you forever.

Tonvanvag's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Tonvanvag's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into orange rooms.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Dolphins are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Tonvanvag loves snails, so they must be honoured.