Mumcutbom Ragdidkim is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, all-knowing toad.

Mumcutbom Ragdidkim created water four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mumcutbom Ragdidkim, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Mumcutbom Ragdidkim, she will laugh at you.

Mumcutbom Ragdidkim's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Mumcutbom Ragdidkim's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never think about dark matter near squirrels while wearing orange boots and balancing four gold spheres on your back.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Mumcutbom Ragdidkim.

4. Hide if five seals approach from the west.

5. Never talk about fire.