Dutflatlen is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, fussy fish.

Dutflatlen created the Milkyway seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dutflatlen, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dutflatlen, he will laugh at you.

Dutflatlen's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Dutflatlen's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Dutflatlen.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.

4. Do not wear cyan clothing.

5. Do not chop down trees.