Cabtettishav is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, kind monkey.

Cabtettishav created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabtettishav, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cabtettishav, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Cabtettishav's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Cabtettishav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not laugh in public.

2. You must pray to Cabtettishav eight times a day.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Cabtettishav on top of all buildings.

5. Put Cabtettishav first in all things.