Tap is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, happy capybara.

Tap created humankind three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tap, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tap, she will come to you in dreams.

Tap's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Tap's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Never feed parsnips to whales while wearing cyan rings.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Tap.