Mitbissmut is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, all-knowing scorpion.

Mitbissmut created the planet Venus seven million years ago.

If you believe in Mitbissmut, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Mitbissmut, it will remove you from existence.

Mitbissmut's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Mitbissmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat aubergines.

2. Never talk about comets.

3. Never feed lots of peanuts to bats while wearing brown hats.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never play with disobedient children.