Hapkonfomdap is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, benevolent yak.

Hapkonfomdap created the Sol system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hapkonfomdap, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hapkonfomdap, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Hapkonfomdap's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Hapkonfomdap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always obey Hapkonfomdap's priests.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.