Mumlamfad is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, awe-inspiring narwhal.

Mumlamfad created Africa eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Mumlamfad, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Mumlamfad, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Mumlamfad's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Mumlamfad's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Mumlamfad in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never play with disobedient children.