Yimdosskantailmadfitnelloop is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unthoughtful guinea pig.

Yimdosskantailmadfitnelloop created a Higgs boson three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yimdosskantailmadfitnelloop, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Yimdosskantailmadfitnelloop, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Yimdosskantailmadfitnelloop's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Yimdosskantailmadfitnelloop's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet pink.

2. Never look at planets.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate nematodes.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Yimdosskantailmadfitnelloop in the centre of the settlement.