Sakbatton is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, strong giraffe.

Sakbatton created carbon two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sakbatton, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sakbatton, it will turn you into a puffin.

Sakbatton's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Sakbatton's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep three geese in a large pit.

2. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Sakbatton in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never wear purple boots.

4. Always treat gulls with great respect.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sakbatton.