Kimstafyarl is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, charitable goblin.

Kimstafyarl created gold two million years ago.

If you believe in Kimstafyarl, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Kimstafyarl, she will throw large rocks at you.

Kimstafyarl's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Kimstafyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into cyan rooms.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Hide if five monkeys approach from the east.