Hatwigril is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, ruthless sheep.

Hatwigril created humankind eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatwigril, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Hatwigril, it will remove you from existence.

Hatwigril's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Hatwigril's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in holy places.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

4. Never talk about amino acids.

5. Never mention hamsters.