Nulcarhiv Stafveenstig is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, two-faced wolf.

Nulcarhiv Stafveenstig created the Whirlpool Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Nulcarhiv Stafveenstig, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Nulcarhiv Stafveenstig, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Nulcarhiv Stafveenstig's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Nulcarhiv Stafveenstig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Hide from magenta turtles for they are unholy.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

4. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never eat green fruit.