Bimlab is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, temperamental cow.

Bimlab created Europe four million years ago.

If you believe in Bimlab, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bimlab, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bimlab's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Bimlab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bimlab.

3. Do not take Bimlab's name in vain.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never write about nebulae.