Fobdumsan is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, astonishing giraffe.

Fobdumsan created dark energy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Fobdumsan, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fobdumsan, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Fobdumsan's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Fobdumsan's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt sharks.

2. Always help goats.

3. Never write about fluid mechanics.

4. Worship no other gods but Fobdumsan.

5. Always treat dolphins with great respect.