Gessmipvab is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, two-faced elephant.

Gessmipvab created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gessmipvab, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gessmipvab, it will turn you into a rock.

Gessmipvab's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Gessmipvab's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate grasshopers.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not wear mauve clothing.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Gessmipvab must be the most important thing in your life.