Negfodpak Xemragkem is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, dishonourable hedgehog.

Negfodpak Xemragkem created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Negfodpak Xemragkem, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Negfodpak Xemragkem, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Negfodpak Xemragkem's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Negfodpak Xemragkem's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Negfodpak Xemragkem.

2. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.

3. You must love Negfodpak Xemragkem.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never talk about archaea.